Oftentimes love, and lust can be hard to define. Yet, one straightforward way to see a difference is to look at how your partner treats you. Are you their sexual object? This is a case that people tend not to realize. What does this mean, being a sexual object? It means that something or someone is looked at as a method of sexual intent from a person. This means to me that your partner sees you as a sex thing. However, this can result in small forms, such as them seeing you as fulfilling their needs only. This is what lust is all about, self-gratification. As for love, your partner will see you as a person to be respected. When there is love, then sex is still essential but becomes less important than their partner.
This can go both ways. How do you see your partner? Do you see them as something to fulfill your needs or as something more and to be respected? This is the difference between love and lust. Love cares for the other, and lust does not.
I find that one method of seeing whether you see your partner as a sexual object or not is by looking at what you would do if, for some reason, they cannot provide you with fulfilling your needs for some reason or another. How would you feel? What would you do? Let’s say your partner cannot be with you for some reason or another. Let’s say it’s been months since your needs have been not fulfilled. A person working with lust will move to look at other people to fulfill their needs. As for love moves a person to consider the reasons why and what they can do about it. They look at finding solutions. This is what makes a difference between love and lust. I am not saying that not fulfilling needs is love, no. Love is all about fulfilling each other’s needs and making two parts become a whole as one. But love makes two people look for solutions and talk to the other to see if they even notice this problem. Love is all about talking and helping each other because sometimes people do not realize where they are. Life tends to take up our time sometimes, like a new mother too tired to be with her husband.
I am not saying that a person has the right to whine or complain to their partner about their needs being unfulfilled. But I do believe in healthy conversation.
Lust is all about the self, and people must see this and understand that if that is not what they want, they should find the love that is theirs. I am a firm believer in love and finding that special someone. And that love can only make a better life and world that we live in.